Before getting into to many specifics here are some quick tips for safety:
1- Secure doors and windows.
2- Test sensory reaction to fire and burglar alarms.
3- Have your home address flagged with law enforcement and fire fighters.
4- Get medical ID bracelet and work on getting your child used to wearing it.
5- Purchase some ID Cards you can carry with you.
6- Teach your child to swim! Talk to local swim instructors to find the best fit for your child.
7- What to do if your child wanders away?
Doors: My child was teaching himself how to turn the deadbolt at 18 months old. Could you imagine going to the bathroom and coming back to find the front door standing wide open and your beloved child is gone? What a nightmare, but it happens very frequently in Autistic families. So how do you secure your doors? First please consider fencing in your property or at minimum your back yard. That provides one more obstacle for your Autistic loved one to overcome and may buy you precious time in the event of an elopement. An easy way to secure your doors is through a simple door latch, especially for young children. Please install this latch at adult height, so even if they stand on a chair the child could not reach it. Eventually the child will figure out they cannot get the door open and will lose interest in trying. For those on the spectrum in the moderate to low functioning range they will be homebound or in a facility for life. These children eventually grow to adult height and may realize they can undo the door latch. Please consider installing a door chime on your doors to alert you to a door being opened. These items are readily available at your local hardware store and are generally inexpensive. These items are a tax write off, so please keep your receipts.
Windows: Windows are usually more secure than doors. On my home we have to unlatch to locks, and then press the handle inwards while lifting the window. I struggle to open them at times, so I, personally, do not worry so much about my child escaping through a window. I have also never shown my children how to open a window. My children are still very young, so they would not need to know how to open a window in case of an emergency. Autistic children will remember what you teach them and it does not take very long for them to learn pesky habits. One of which could be opening a window, if you teach or unknowingly show them how. Some children have an affinity for tinkering. Autistic children are very curious and explore all the time. So if your child figures out the windows do not panic. Get window bars with a quick release tool in case of an emergency.
Alarms: Every child is different; please use your digression as a parent in determining the mental and physical capabilities of your child, especially in emergency situations. I strongly urge you to purposefully test your fire alarms and set off your home alarm to gauge your child's reaction. One night my husband came home late from work and the alarm went off in the house. I was asleep in our room at the time. When I heard the alarm I came out of our room and found my then two year old, Aiden, in the hallway. He had escaped from his bedroom by climbing the baby gate we keep in front of his doorway. The alarm is extremely loud and this caused my son to go into an autistic tantrum. I will talk about autistic tantrums more specifically in another post, but to give you an idea an autistic tantrum is a temper tantrum on steroids. My son covered his ears, screamed, and dropped into a ball in the hallway. I quickly shut off the alarm and went to Aiden. I gently touched his shoulder and tried talking to him. Aiden lashed out at me for the first time and took me by surprise. He hit, kicked, and tried to bite me.
That story sounds horrifying. You're probably thinking "What a terrible child" or "You should discipline him more". The thing you must remember is this: My child, being Autistic, has no idea what he is doing during an Autistic tantrum. His fight or flight is on overdrive due to the sensory overload. I tell you this story to show you the importance of understanding your child's reactions in emergency situations. I am glad I discovered this before the police or fire fighters had to respond to my home.
Let’s imagine for a moment the outcome of a house fire. The smell of smoke, the heat of the fire, the house alarm, sirens, flashing lights, people talking, and add in fear or confusion. Then, almost suddenly, a strange looking monster in a weird suit will try to grab you. It sounds like the making of a great horror movie, but this is real life. Now try to imagine handling all of that and suffering from sensory processing issues, which most Autistic children suffer from. I will also discuss Sensory Processing Disorder in another more in depth post, but SPD, in a nutshell, is an inability to filter out input from the world around you. Now let’s imagine being a cop or firefighter responding to this house. Panicked parents are outside; their child is trapped in the house. Every parent's worst nightmare is coming true before their eyes. The first responder makes entry into the home and finds the child or young adult. Now imagine having to physically fight the very person you are trying to save. Imagine how frustrating that must be.
Flag Your Address: I am a first responder in the Orlando area. I am begging you as a mother and a first responder, please call your non-emergency hotline, every agency has one, for law enforcement and fire fighters. Ask them to flag your address as the home of an Autistic child or individual. Whenever you call 9-1-1 one of the first sentences you say should be: "Please take care when responding to this address, an Autistic individual lives here". The agency should ask you for a basic description and what the child's tendencies are. If your child has a violent reaction under stress, TELL THEM THAT. It is not bad, but they need to be prepared for the possibility and understand the risks involving that person's behavior. It helps first responders react better and faster if they know every variable involved.
Medical Alert ID's/ ID Cards: One more scenario to discuss is the horrible possibility of wandering. Autistic children wander away or bolt from their caregivers on a frequent basis. This event occurs often, is dangerous, and is understandably extremely scary for the parent. Please consider an ID bracelet for your loved one with Autism. My son has one. We got his from company called Vital ID. Their website is: https://www.vitalid.com/ These types of items can also be purchased from Amazon, EBay, or any other retailer like this. Some companies have developed tracking devices of all different kinds, please look into these options if you feel you need them. We also have ID cards for Aiden that attach to a lanyard. We travel with one at all times, we have one in the house, and both sets of grandparents have one. Why an ID card? In the event that your child goes missing and cannot be immediately located, most parents are incredibly distraught. Almost to distraught to offer an accurate account of the situation or an in depth description. We used a company called Kids Travel Card. I did not know this at the time, but the owner has an autistic grandson. Of course you may feel free to use any ID card company you wish, but here is the website to Kids Travel Card if you are interested: http://www.kidstravelcard.com/ Somewhere on your card please indicate the warnings for your child. For example mine says: "High Functioning Autism. IS verbal. Scared of loud noises and sudden light. Is sensitive to temperature changes, such as extreme heat. Will fight if afraid".
Swimming: According to the National Autism Association drowning is the leading cause of death among Autistic individuals. They further add to this statistic by stating in 2009, 2010, and 2011 accidental drowning accounted for approximately 91% of deaths reported in children with Autism Spectrum Disorder from the ages of 14 to younger, subsequent to wandering or eloping events. Children with Autism are drawn to shiny objects and water shines or glistens in light, even moon light. This is one theory that explains why drowning deaths occur in such high number among Autistic individuals. Please put a fence around your pool, encourage those in your neighborhood to do the same. Be sure to frequently check the locks on your gates and the integrity of your screens, if used. Also enroll your Autistic loved one in swimming classes. The YMCA is one organization that offers special needs swimming classes. You can read more about swimming facts and safety tips from the National Autism Association here:
http://nationalautismassociation.org/resources/autism-safety-facts/
What to do if your child has wandered away?
1- Search the immediate area around your home and inside your home thoroughly. Even if you find the door standing wide open, search the inside of your home. Favorite hiding places, under beds, in closets, behind couches. Be methodical and quick. Ideally your significant other will be home at the time of the incident. One of you should begin the search, while the other begins step 2 and then 3. Time is of the essence in these situations. It is better to be over react, than under react, but over react in a controlled manner.
2- Call 9-1-1, do not wait longer than a few minutes. Try to be as calm and articulate as possible. Understand you will be in a panicked state, but if you cannot clearly articulate your emergency the dispatcher cannot give good information to those responding to assist you. Be clear the child is Autistic. You may call from a cell phone if you are searching, but a police officer will have to meet with you in person. There are multiple reasons for this, but when they ask where to meet tell them a place and immediately go to that place. You must be the point everything and everyone revolves around. As a parent the hardest thing to do is sit still when your loved one has gone missing.
These matters are handled very seriously by law enforcement. The fastest way to activate the largest group of people at your disposal is to call 9-1-1 first. Law enforcement across the nation has begun more in depth training in the area of Autism, what steps need to be taken, and where they need to go. Please do not hang up with your dispatcher until they tell you it is ok to do so. You may ask to hang up once you have told them where you live, where to meet with you, your child's description, and provided them with a description of yourself with a contact phone number. Remember do not hang up until the dispatcher says it is ok, sometimes they have very specific questions they need answered and those questions vary by agency. If and when they say it’s ok, hang up and begin step 3. If they do not want you to hang up, stay on the line and do not worry about step 3. Retrieve a previously worn article of clothing and ideally place it in a paper bag, if a paper bag is not available use a Ziploc or plastic grocery bag. This can be used for a possible K9 track.
When your police officer arrives stay with them. Tell them you have an article of clothing available for a K9 if they need it. Some agencies do not have a K9 at their immediate disposal, but it is helpful to a vast majority, do not make a pre-determination on your agencies capabilities. Try to speak clearly and calmly to the officer. Answer their questions directly, they ask very specific questions for very important reasons. You may feel like you are repeating information, repeat it anyway. Be sure to tell them where your child likes to go and how they are used to getting there. Autistic children are very habitual and will take familiar routes or transportation modes to get to familiar locations. Taking the bus to grandma's house is a simple, but effective example of this situation.
3- If your dispatcher gives you permission to hang up, continue with this step. Have an emergency plan in place. Keep a list of your neighbor’s phone numbers, call them. Discuss this with your neighbors before the event and determine who would be willing to help. Tell them your child has wandered away from home, ask them to help you look for your child. Ask one to go to the nearest community park, ask the other to check any bodies of water (pool, lake, streams, etc.) in the area, etc. Tell them what the child was last seen wearing. Do not dwell in this conversation; you need to keep your phone line open. The conversation should go something like this: (These are made up names and people.) "Kathy, this is Sue next door. Mike has gone missing. Please help us find him. I need you to please check the park. He was wearing a red, Spiderman shirt and black jeans. If you find him please bring him (to your agreed location: home, park, etc.) or flag down a police man. I have already called 9-1-1. I am hanging up." Then hang up. That conversation should take a minute or two at the most.
Also consider a phone tree. That way you call one person and they know who to call next. It just continues in a trickle effect. This is the most effective and productive method, but it also requires good relations in the neighborhood.
For more helpful tips on wandering, including work sheets and packets, please be sure to look at this link: http://www.autismspeaks.org/wandering-resources
I hope this post offers you some guidance and valuable information. For continued updates and futher suggestions, as well as references to other helpful resources and information please like our Facebook page at: https://www.facebook.com/AidensHereos
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